POOR KIDS
The seventh sign of the Apocalypse is now officially upon us: Britney Spears is expecting twins, the New York Daily News reports. What's more, a spy for the paper's Lowdown column adds that she's put dad-to-be Kevin Federline "on a leash" spendingwise. It's a good thing, too, 'cause if little Whitney and Jitney are ever gonna be able to buy skanky hanger-on spouses of their own, they're gonna need every dime Mama can save. |
JUST A GIGOLO... WITH A DESK JOB
When Howard Stern leaves Infinity Broadcasting at the end of the year, among the personalities in line to replace him at the mike is David Lee Roth. So says SteppinOutMagazine.com, neatly sidestepping the question of whether the former Van Halen frontman is flatulent enough to fill Stern's bottomless pants. |
FANTASY ISLAND
What do you acquire if you're a star who has everything? No, Angelina, not Ethiopian babies — an island! Leonardo DiCaprio has bought himself Blackadore Caye, off the coast of Belize, People reports. He hopes to use the 104-acre isle as the site of a resort with renewable energy resources. And, please god, a bellhop named Tattoo. Please? |
STARS POWER
Gee, we never saw this coming: Dancing with the Stars won the night Wednesday, scoring nearly 22 million viewers and, if there's any justice in Hollywood, bringing a stack of Ashley Judd movie scripts to Kelly Monaco's doorstep. That same evening, Beauty and the Geek's finale enticed an audience of only 4.1 million (which is like 22 million in WB ratings), but we blame that comparatively low number on Mindi's promise to make out with Richard if they beat Chuck and Caitilin. |
NOT-QUITE-LIVE 8
After being taken to task for incessantly interrupting their Live 8 coverage, MTV and VH1 are going to rerun 10 hours of it commercial-free tomorrow. VH1 will broadcast the first five hours starting at 10 am/ET, then the next five will air on MTV beginning at 3 pm. Wait, music on MTV? Somebody pinch me! |
ZSA ZSA'S OK
After suffering an apparent stroke, Zsa Zsa Gabor underwent emergency surgery Wednesday to clear a blocked artery. The movie starlet-turned-cop-slapper has been under a lot of stress, said husband No. 9, Frederic von Anhalt, stemming from the elder-abuse lawsuit she filed against daughter Francesca Hilton. |
HE CAN'T GO FOR THAT
Hall & Oates have canceled all of their concerts until next month so that lead vocalist Daryl Hall can recover from Lyme disease. "We promise to make it up to (our fans)," the singer said in a statement. Methinks you've just been guaranteed a "Rich Girl" encore. |
REALITY BITES BACK
Reality-TV "writers" have filed a lawsuit against the fat-cat producers of their shows in hopes of forcing them to sign a contract abolishing "sweatshop" working conditions. But really, how hard can it possibly be to slap subtitles on an episode of Big Brother? |
COURTING CONTROVERSY
Morgan Freeman is investing in ClickStar, Inc., a digital entertainment company that — sometime next year, they hope — will let moviegoers watch films online before their DVD releases. Wanna take a wild guess whose flicks are suddenly going to find themselves on the bottom shelf at Blockbuster? |
FINS TO THE LEFT, FINS TO THE RIGHT
Armageddon screenwriter Shane Salerno has been brought in to give a little extra bite to the script for the Jurassic-shark thriller Meg, Twister director Jan de Bont's summer '06 blockbuster-in-the-making. In related news, Meg author Steve Alten has announced that he will continue his series of novels about really Great Whites with a fourth installment, Hell's Aquarium. |
IT'S A DEAL
Although ABC took a pass on the hit international game show Deal or No Deal — some kind of gambling hooey — NBC has bought the rights to the series and is hurrying it into production. Not to sound curmudgeonly or anything, but I think the alphabet network had the right idea. |
